I just have to vent here for a minute so you will have to excuse me if this comes off as so incredibly wrong but I have simply had it..... I had waited so patiently - well patiently for me, for someone to hold up to what they said they would do to "help" me out and I have not seen it. I am so beyond frustrated I can't even put it into words. It has been over a year since a plan was put into motion and even though I feel that the plan was meant with the best of intentions the road to hell is most definitely paved with them. I know I sound ungrateful when I complain but from my eyes I don't see an effort being made and it is hurtful and frustrating. I am beyond stuck between a rock and hard place and no one is there to grab my hand and help me out. I have no idea how I am supposed to get my kid's to two different schools at two different times with one car and one driver... It hit me today when I had to fill out paperwork for schools that I have absolutely no one to add as an emergency contact and it had me in tears and I am not a crier by any means but I never felt so alone as I did at that moment when I was staring at 5 empty lines and I had no one to list. I am hurt I am frustrated I am scared and I have no idea what to do to get my kids what they need and I am so tired of hearing that my kids will be fine if schools have to change - no they won't - I know my kids and what they have been through and changing schools just might send us all over the edge. They have been through more than any kid should and I refuse to make them deal with any more crap because I made the mistake of believing in someone/something that is not going to happen.
I just want so badly for things to work out the way they should. I want to stop feeling so damn alone and my kids to stop feeling like "sloppy seconds" to everyone. I deserve to know if minds have changed, I deserve to be told the truth no matter how bad it hurts and I deserve someone to hold my damn hand and help me move the rocks that keep trying to crush me.
We are moving back to my parents house on the 24th, put me as an emergency contact! I'll be working full time, but I can for sure help you if you need it!!
ReplyDeleteI guess I need to vent also because I see this as being directed to me totally. I have never referred to you or anyone in your family as "sloppy seconds" so that is kinda offensive to me to begin with. I am sorry that I am not totally wealthy so that I can buy anything that comes along, I do have an amount that I need to stay within and I do need it to be a certain type of building so that there are not a whole bunch of repairs that need to be done and I cannot afford to do them. I am sorry that you feel that you made a mistake of believing in "someone" (we know who that is talking about). I do the best that I am capable of doing, and if that is not good enough I cannot help that at all. I guess I am no better than someone we both know and are related to in our lives, I certainly try to do what I can. I got involved in a short sale which sometimes take a long time to do and it went bust, not because of me or you but a dishonest realtor, and I guess this is my fault in the end. I have narrowed the search down to the area that you "need" to keep the kids in their schools and there are just not a lot of places that fit my criteria for rental, I do not want something slummy, sorry again. I have not changed my mind and have looked at a lot of places but it seems nothing I do seems good enough or fast enough for anyone. I do not have the power to do more than I can afford and if that is not good enough than I don't know what else I can do. I have never been dishonest in my dealings and feel like I am being accused of it now. I certainly hope not but it sure feels that way. Sometimes things do not always work the way we think they should but in the end work out for the better and it is hard to wait for the right outcome. I can only move as fast as things allow me to move and see what is out there to buy and what I can afford. I wish I had all the money in the world to do just what I wanted to at every moment when I wanted it, but that is not realistic in any way. Sorry, Sorry that I cannot fulfill all your wants and needs at the moment you want and need it, I can only do what I can do!
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